Klingons Angered by Stolen Bridge Design

Ghay'cha'!

April, 01, 2008 , by Chad

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imageOriginal Klingon bridge at Kronos, the home planet.

Angered by the inappropriate usage of their ceremonial bridge design, a Klingon battalion has taken over the Raleigh I-440 greenway bridge. The group is armed and will not allow any afternoon joggers to pass.

The bridge was recently built as a way to link the Raleigh greenway to the North Carolina Museum of Art.

This same bridge was first built on Kronos for the annual Klingon ceremony of R’uustai, a bonding ceremony which joins two individuals together in a relationship similar to brotherhood.

“This bridge is part of our cultural heritage, to usurp the design is a mockery of our Klingon way of life, ghay’cha’!” said Supreme Architect Koloth, who originally designed the bridge.

The Raleigh city council has been quick to take action. A Klingon diplomacy study group has been created to research the best practices of the three recent Starship Enterprise captains. “I think it is important to recall Captain Picard’s successful resolution to the Borg crises and use that as a precedent for our current Klingon problems,” said the group leader. “While Janeway looks good on paper I don’t think we’d be able to implement her ideas in this situation.”

The council approved the action 7 to 1. Councilman Isley was the only dissenting vote.

The council will hold a public hearing concerning the Klingon problem sometime in the Fall.

imageA Klingon lieutenant at the greenway pedestrian bridge.

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  • 150
    04/01 06:08 PM

    Isn’t an April Fool’s joke supposed to be believeable?

  • Vince Carmody
    04/01 06:19 PM

    oh, shit, that’s hilarious.

  • Les
    04/01 07:02 PM

    I’m not even a Star Trek fan and I love this post!

  • devin
    04/01 07:06 PM

    150, are you saying you don’t believe in klingons?

  • RaleighRob
    04/01 07:07 PM

    Wow.  I never realized how similar architecturally that bridge was to Klingon stuff on TV till you now mention it.  Uncanny.

    Funny article though…I especially love the “study group” by the council!  LOL

  • Jim
    04/01 08:45 PM

    Truly Onion-worthy.  Bravo!

  • Drew
    04/03 05:37 PM

    CHEGH-chew jaj-VAM jaj-KAK!!!

  • Ween
    05/01 05:48 PM

    I concur with Drew.

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