This Week in Film: Tyler Perry Is More Cynical Than I Am

In Theaters

This week is absolutely PACKED with new releases at the multiplex, but it's the old double-edged sword of quantity not equaling quality.

Let's start with the Bieb. Justin Bieber: Never...Say...........NEVER! is finally released for the preteens and pedos to enjoy together as Mother Nature intended. I don't know what to tell you folks, it's a concert film/documentary about the life of a child that is still waiting for puberty.

Next up is the newest Adam Sandler comedy, Just Go With It, starring Jennifer Aniston as a bookworm destined to take off her glasses and suddenly become attractive, and featuring Brooklyn Decker as a jiggly blond. This will make one zillion dollars.

Batting third, we have The Eagle, starring... wait a second, are you serious? This is the story of a Roman soldier fighting Celts in 3AD, and they cast Channing Tatum as the Roman? Wow, did Kevin James ask for too much money?

In the cleanup spot, we have Gnomeo & Juliet. Here are your warning signs: It's Disney, and it's CGI, but it's not Pixar, and it's released under their Touchstone banner. Also, when your main selling point is, "Hey, Elton John did our soundtrack, but it's 80% old material!” well, I'm not saying; I'm just saying.

Finally, we're getting down to the art house selections for this week. The Company Men, The Weinstein Company's long-awaited release starring Ben Affleck, Kevin Costner, and Tommy Lee Jones in the story of three men dealing with layoffs, finally comes to our area. And Sofia Coppola's latest, Somewhere, drops in the Triangle. The story of a movie star shaken from his malaise by the unexpected arrival of an eleven-year-old daughter, Somewhere stars Stephen Dorff and Elle Fanning. I'm not sure which theaters in the Triangle will get these two films, only that they will be released locally on Friday.

Finally, the Academy Award nominee animated film The Illusionist, the story of a French magician who travels to Scotland to find work, will begin screening at The Galaxy Theater in Cary and The Chelsea Theater in Chapel Hill Friday.

Special Showings

The Colony Theater in Raleigh held another screening of its Cinema Overdrive series this Wednesday, Feb 9th, with The Telephone Book. The 1971 gem is, to quote the trailer, "the story of a young woman who falls in love with the world's greatest obscene phone call."

On DVD

This is a bad week for DVD releases. We start off with Life As We Know It, the film where everyone in America lets out a collective, "Meh," at Katherine Heigl's talents. Of course, who thought Josh Duhamel could help open a film. It’s the story of a mismatched pair forced to join forces and raise a baby when their friends die in an accident. Hey, it's like Brewster's Millions, only instead of cash, you get dirty diaper duty!

Then we have You Again, a film that most of you have forgotten was even released this past year but that I, unfortunately, still have night terrors about. You Again is #1 on my personal list of 2010’s worst movies. Starring Kristen Bell, Sigourney Weaver, Jamie Lee Curtis, and Betty White (because she has to be in everything until she dies), it was filmed like a Disney Channel original, so I never understood why they didn't cast cheap and skip the theaters altogether.

Finally you have For Colored Girls. Since the original review, my opinion of the movie has only gotten worse over time. In Tyler Perry’s world, if there's a man around, you're gonna get raped, beaten, lied to, trifled with, and infected with diseases. The dude is more cynical that I am, if that's possible.

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Entertainment , Other posts by Isaac Weeks.

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Colony Theater Galaxy Cinema Cinema Overdrive Chelsea Theater

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